Be your own Disneyland.

Thursday, April 29

Doing the happy "today's my Friday and I get to leave town for 4 days tomorrow" dance. Yeehaw.

Tuesday, April 27

Jane was kind enough to offer me a preview ticket to see Laws of Attraction tonight, which we were both ashamed to admit that we enjoyed. Not to appear star-struck, however, the highlight of my evening (other than spending several hours with Jane, of course) was meeting Renee Richardson, one of morning show cast of one of my favorite radio stations. That's all - I didn't ask for an autograph, she won't remember me past getting on her scooter, but it was nice to meet someone who makes me laugh while commuting in to work every day. She was cool, we talked all the way out of the building, and you'll get to hear Jane (and maybe me a little bit) on the station on Friday morning, sometime b/w 6:30 and 7:30 a.m.

From Jessa: SIZE 12 WEDDING DRESS - SURE IS A BEAUTY! CHEAP! USED ONLY ONCE! Someone should get this guy a blog.

So it was a weekend of parties and fun - went dancing on Friday night, MJ's birthday party on Saturday, and a baseball game followed by bbq'd salmon steaks and ice cream (with maple syrup - yum!) at Jane's on Sunday.

Despite all that good stuff, though, I find myself depressed and down. I got angry with a friend and I let him know about it. I find that I'm not as good at keeping my feelings to myself lately ... I would try harder, but I feel so darn justified. And it's not like I'm yelling at him and calling him names, just expressing how I feel. Problem is, it doesn't necessarily make me feel better.

You didn't ask, but I'll tell you about it anyway: I take drinking and driving rather seriously. Perhaps because I didn't really learn to enjoy drinking till rather late in the game, so I don't have the background of being young and dumb and overindulgent without having thought of how I'm going to get home. I'm always aware of how I'm getting home when I'm out drinking, and how my friends are getting home as well. I've always thought of driving under the influence as one of the stupidest things a person can do. There is simply no excuse for it. None. The amount of easily-avoided harm that can result is staggering. Perhaps those sappy movies about how MADD or SADD started should be required viewing in Driver's Ed.

So anyway, I went to the party on Saturday with some friends with the understanding that I would be the designated driver.

They had alcohol in hand as soon as we walked in the door. And every time I turned around, they had a new drink in their hands. I was stuck with pear juice and Hansen's Rasberry soda. And cheese. Lots and lots of cheese. We were at this party from 9 till about 2? 2:30? I had to go wake up the friend who had driven from where he'd passed out on the couch to tell him it was time to go. We got to the door, and I held out my hand and asked for the keys. Mind you, I had not been drinking at all, nor was I tired (can we say 'sugar rush'?). He insisted that he was fine. I told him he could drive himself home from my place, but he needed to give me the keys so that I could get as far as my apartment. He insisted again that he was fine.

Now, like I said, I'm late to this drinking thing. Maybe he was fine. Maybe anyone who drinks 10 beers in the course of an evening and then sleeps for an hour is ok to drive. I don't know. All I know is that when I have even one beer and then wait 3-4 hours after, I'm tired, which is just about as dangerous on the road as drunk. Perhaps I should have argued till I got my way. That would have shown real conviction. But I'm a wuss, and I just cursed and stalked to the car, getting in the back seat and barking out directions to get us back to my place.

What does this mean? It means that there's an arguement that I don't know how to finish between me and one of my best friends. It also means that I don't get to go drinking with friends anymore, since I can't trust them to not drink and drive, so I get to be the designated driver for the rest of my life. Yeehaw.

Still, it was a mostly good weekend. And this weekend? Dallas!!

Sunday, April 25

Wacky search results:

what to do if you are a dork on a saturday night in berkeley california

I only know about being a dork. I don't know what to do on a Saturday night in Berkeley though. Sorry.

Friday, April 23

We're going dancing tonight!! 111 Minna, 10 p.m. Come join us!

Thursday, April 22

The tagline I should have taken:
I put the 'Pro' in 'Procrastination'. [Wonderchicken]

I tried a long time ago, because I was persuaded that it was the coolest thing on the block - streaming radio! you can rate the stuff you like! wow! However, all it really did was teach me the evils of Java apps and I abandoned it after it slowed my system, kept playing stuff I didn't like, and was generally crappy. Years later, most of my co-workers (at least, those with soundcards) are listening to it again, and I thought I'd give it another shot.

I love it. No Java app, it's been playing all the good stuff for the past 2 hours ... I think it's most telling that what I'm afraid of at this point is that I'm going to accidentally close the window.

More on Breedster:

I am the proud parent of 6 eggs. And like a good parent, I want to see my eggs hatch and grow into beautiful, prolific children.

Who wants to be a bug?

Insomnia sucks.

Wednesday, April 21

Your Basic Bad Idea

Google, backwards

Shiny new office products: 2 thumbs up!

Stinky shiny new office products: um ... 1 thumb, 1 middle finger up!

Porno name visualized [via Tina]

Tuesday, April 20

Dining Out For Life - April 29, 2004 - The Center for AIDS Services

You can contribute to East Bay AIDS Services just by going out for lunch or dinner on Thursday, April 29th

There are a lot of Oakland, Berkeley, Walnut Creek, and other East Bay restaurants participating by giving 25% or more of your bill to the Center for AIDS Services.

To find the restaurants just go the website

Some of the restaurants are participating for lunch, some for dinner, and some for both; it's all listed on the website. Please let the restaurant know that you are participating in the Dining Out for Life program.

Monday, April 19

Doh! I just remembered. It was 5 years ago today (well, in another 2 hours) that the efforts of Jessa, Jennifer, ex-Roommie and my mother (and myself, to some extent) all came together to achieve what I thought was unachievable.

I finished grad school. Thanks, ladies.

We celebrated my friend Esin's 29th birthday on Friday night. Luckily, the crowning moment of the evening was toward the very end, when we were at O'Reilly's. Witness this. I should mention that she had just adjusted her pants, pulling them up.

Sunday, April 18

I went to see two comic book movies today: Hellboy and The Punisher.

For the love of god, people, don't bring your kids to see movies like this. There were more babies and toddlers in The Punisher than when I went to see Finding Nemo. And yes, they cried. And walked around. And kicked seats.

Save up a little more money. Get a babysitter. Leave the kiddies at home. You'll be doing everyone a favor.

And btw, the movies rocked.

Saturday, April 17

Friendster ... Breedster ... and now STDster.

Where will the madness end?

I have managed, through my own ineptitude, to flake on two different events that I had been planning to attend today. I expect that none of my friends will ever ask me to do anything ever again.

And so begins my life as a social hermit.

Friday, April 16

Alright, this Breedster business is just weird. Someone copulated with me during the night and got me knocked up (which explains why I overslept). Mind you, I love my child, but I'm not sure this feeling of virtual violation is worth it.

And whoever came here searching for the name for fear of peanut butter sticking to the roof of your gums, could you let me know what that is? I'm very curious.

Doh! It would appear that I already knew that one!

Thursday, April 15

I've been getting asked a lot recently if I have an rss feed, but only from men. Women don't ask me that kind of stuff. Why is that?

I was discussing infatuation with a few friends in separate conversations recently, and they each made reference to how wonderful it can be.

One said: They should bottle that shit and sell it. I mean, even if it has to be by prescription, that's fine by me.

The other: Man, it's like the Fountain of Youth.

And they both agreed that while the low points of the emotional rollercoaster were utter anguish, the high points couldn't be beat. I hope I never get too old for this.

Wednesday, April 14

Various and sundry links from my friend Jon:

Yahoo gets spiritual (notice the paid ads, they're the best)
You have to try out the Porno Hen (direct link)
I have to try this one of these days: Road trick (I love the laughter at the end)

Notes I made last night when I was too tired to elaborate:

volunteering and bay to breakers and dinner with josh and hairnets.

I volunteered last night, and it was fun. We spent two short hours repackaging pasta from large 10 lb bags into smaller 2 lb bags. It was the first time I've ever worn a hair net. I'm not all that anxious to repeat that part of the experience. But hanging out with volunteers is fun - generally only nice people volunteer.

Tomorrow is the last day to register for Bay to Breakers for the reduced rate.

Josh came into town last night and Jessa, MJ, Jane, Kevin and Suzan and I all went to Beppos for dinner. Good company, good food, good all around. And leftovers for lunch today, yum.

Monday, April 12

Online dating experiences - I expected so much more from this article. [via Jon]

Stuff learned this weekend:

I cannot not cry at a funeral.

Bring a jacket, even if it's not appropriate.

When you're around a dog, you're going to get dog hair on you. Get over it.

Compassion - you can't imagine how important it is.*

If I have a big brunch, I don't have to eat anything else during the day.

I have become one of those people who is better online than they are on the phone. I console myself that I am at my best in person.

*The deceased's sister had lost their mother, then their father, and now her sister. Yes, she's married with kids, but how lonely to be without those who have known you your entire life. In any case, she was hurrying after hearing the news of her sister's death to get to her brother-in-law's side, and encountered behavior that, out of context, seems normal, if a little rude. Knowing that it happened to her, though, while she was in the throes of this terrible loss makes it all the more important to remember to at least try to give people the benefit of the doubt. They are the walking wounded, with wounds you cannot see.

Sunday, April 11

Happy Easter!

Streaking at the game

The Exorcist, Bunny Rabbit Style

Thursday, April 8

So I've been watching Band of Brothers since the weekend, an excellent and disturbing miniseries about Easy Company in WWII. And some of the Marines who were killed in Iraq the other day were from the Bay area. And I'm going Home this weekend for a funeral.

I'm going to stop blaming my tendency to cry at the drop of a hat on pms. It's overwhelming, all this death.

ps: I'm in training all day, and I left my email program running at home, so I am essentially out of touch till much much later this afternoon. I hope you're all enjoying your Thursday.

Wednesday, April 7

So Edmond is hiking the Pacific Crest Trail again, and hoping to finish it before he has to be back in Canada for grad school.

Here's his schedule.

Here's where to send stuff.

Here's how to get in touch with him electronically.

Yesterday was not a good day: It started off at 5:30 a.m., when Jish called and woke me out of a sound sleep to inform me that I had forgotten to pick him up and take him to the airport. I am a flake. I had an Extremely Bad Hair Day. I got cramps.

But it turned out not so bad after all: I had a good job review and a raise. The cramps turned out not as bad as I feared. I got my laundry done and I dusted my apartment.

Today is still a toss-up - I woke up at 6:30 a.m. today, which is when I'm supposed to leave for work. I haven't showered or eaten and I suspect another Extremely Bad Hair Day. But it's early yet, I'm hoping it improves considerably and soon.

Monday, April 5

Today is the birthday of the family friend who died a week and a half ago. I'm going Home this weekend for the memorial services.

Jish and Colin, this is for you: the new IKEA work bench. [via Ernie]

Am I projecting, or did everyone on the freeway seem to be in a bad mood this morning?

I don't remember ever being this bitter about the time change. But it's a bitterness brought on by lack of sleep, which I hope to remedy tonight. I'm pretty sure that last night's feelings of wide-awakeness at 11 p.m. will not be repeated tonight.

Saturday, April 3

Comments work!

Friday, April 2

We were alerted at work earlier today that there was a man on the Bay Bridge who was threatening to jump. That was at 2 p.m. At 4, when I usually get off work, he was still there, and traffic was backed up for miles, and complicating traffic on all of the other bridges as people tried to get around the jam.

I was heartily glad at that point that I had a good excuse to stick around in the East bay, as I'd made some appointments to see apartments (yes, I'm really looking now). So I talked a co-worker who would have been sitting in the hours of traffic to come apartment-looking with me. And we did, and the apartments were dismal - the sort that you know as soon as you walk through the door that there's no way in hell that you would spend the night there. I had to drive him back to his car at the office, and we got stuck in traffic just going half a mile on the freeway, but it was moving somewhat. So we decided to put it off even longer, thinking maybe if we had dinner, then the trip home would be relatively painless.

It wasn't.

It still took me an hour and a half to get home, and the first hour and fifteen minutes of that was spent just getting to the first half of the eastern span. After that, it only took me 15 minutes (if that) to get through the City and to my apartment.

I feel sorry for the guy - suicide attempts, as I'm sure you know, are cries for help. And he was crying really really loudly. Every time I felt irritable at him, I tried to imagine how lost in pain he would have to be to do something like that. I can't imagine it. I hope there weren't too many people who yelled at him to jump after sitting in their cars for a few hours trying to get home.

So I'm trying to change my eating habits to include less refined wheat/sugar products, so I bought a bunch of fresh stuff at the beginning of this week. All of a sudden, my food is colorful and exciting, and I may just make it without having to throw anything out for waiting too long.

But I have to find something less like rabbit food to eat soon, or I'll never be able to look another head of lettuce in the eye again.

Just as I was chatting about this with Ruaraidh, I stumbled across this. Anyone want to come over for dinner tonight? [via Feministe]

You know, y'all can let me know when comments aren't working. I just thought no one was reading!

UPDATE: And they're still not working. I'll get them fixed soon enough.

Thursday, April 1

I know it shows a deplorable lack of humor on my part, but I really dislike April Fool's day. I suppose it's because I don't lie often, so I don't look for it in other people, and I keep getting caught. You know, sort of a bad sport complex. I don't care. I hate it.

Yay! My taxes are in the mail! No foolin'.